Alright – we have one of our guys (Justin) who’s into more extreme versions of sex than most the BFS review team. Justin’s into fetishes, having been introduced to it by some ex-girlfriend in college. He has a few fetishes so we asked him to go ahead and review a few fetish sites for us. This is his review of ALT.COM, which he’s been using for quite some time now. We haven’t included it in our general ranking – because we focus on fling sites – it’s still the best review we’ve published.

Amy, if you’re out there and reading this – thanks for sticking your high-heel in his ass while biting down on his nipple!

We are forever grateful to you for providing us with a foot soldier for fetish site reviews – not to mention the hours of amusement we get from busting his balls! (not fetish-busting – regular guy-bugs-another-guy ball-busting)

And before you ask, SORRY JUSTIN, you can’t erase the above paragraph! Password protected posts ROCK!

- The BFS ‘Justin Rocks’ Team


Hi all – this is Justin. This is going to be a solo review – because the other guys are too scared to try new shit.

This isn’t the first time I’ve tried ALT.COM. I’ve been into the fetish scene for awhile – so when the site was initially released, I just *had* to try it. Back then, ALT.COM wasn’t that great – but the experience this time around was a lot better as the site’s been through a number of changes.

Initially, I went looking online because the BDSM scene in Cleveland (Ohio) just wasn’t that great. There’d be the odd party – but you’d have to be ‘in the know’ to make the cut. Then, I moved to NYC – and that was one long fucking sexual ecstasy trip compared to what I had access to in Cleveland. Two years ago, I took a job in Madison (Wisconsin). Back to square one. What I did find is that the internet connects a lot of people with compatible fetishes. That’s when I went back online – I use a few sites these days – but this review is specifically about ALT. The site – not the key …

I signed up for ALT.COM awhile ago. I’ve been using the site pretty regularly since and I’ve had some decent success with it. At this point, I have a steady stream of regular partners, about half of which I’ve met on ALT.COM.

I want to outline a few things for those of you that are curious about BDSM and / or new to the scene. When you signup for a site like ALT.COM there’s a few things you need to know.


First – just because you have a fetish doesn’t mean that EVERYONE that’s on ALT.COM will be a compatible partner to play it out. BDSM requires a level of understanding and compatibility between two people that goes WAY BEYOND regular ‘vanilla’ dating. In general this is because the person with a submissive fetish ‘gives into’ a dominant personality. So the rules by which play time is governed are of the UTMOST importance.

Second – when you are in ‘play time’ mode, you ALWAYS need to respect the ‘rule of the safeword’. This is a pre-agreed word / signal by playing parties. When any party playing BDSM games invokes the safeword, YOU MUST STOP PLAY TIME DEAD IN IT’S TRACKS. Just because you have a fetish, doesn’t mean you don’t have any limits.

Finally – if you’ve never met fetish-minded people online before, you need to know this. It’s NOT easier to ‘get some’. In fact – it takes longer to find good partners. Why? For the reasons found in #1. Because you’re dealing with complete strangers (and vice-versa), prospective partners have a tendency of meeting in very social & very public gatherings MULTIPLE TIMES. We do this to build trust, and talk about what is and isn’t permissible when we start to play together. It’s like a beautiful dance where one negotiates play time conditions. YOU CAN’T BYPASS THIS – AND YOU SHOULDN’T TRY TO.

There is one thing you’ll quickly notice in this community:


Even though both parties want to ‘get their kink on’, being patient is part of the game.


The site specializes in connecting people that ‘dig’ the BDSM lifestyle. You won’t get much with the free membership, except a sneak peek at what *could* be if you upgrade. This isn’t a deception – most ‘specialty’ meeting sites (websites that tailor to very specific niches) consider this standard practice. So be ready to pony-up a few dollars if you’re serious about wanting to explore this side of your sexuality.

A list of fetishes is at the end of this post!

Like every site, the ratio of men to women is skewed at about 3 men to 1 woman. That can be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on what you’re looking for fetish-wise.

The site offers your standard set of person-to-person communication features: Instant Messaging, Private Messaging, Audio Chat and Video Chat. These features that ALT.COM introduced a little over a year ago. When first introduced, these would crash often – they generally weren’t loved.

About 6 months ago, I noticed some changes were made to these features. For this review, the guys ‘asked’ me to spend a few weeks finding new partners on ALT.COM. From this last set of tests, they are now petty much rock-solid.

Now – here’s the part of this review that *really* matters.

Given that the above set of features ISN’T ANY DIFFERENT than those found on most modern dating sites … how do you actually ‘get some’ on ALT.COM? Let’s examine this in a little more detail. If someone on a regular dating site like doesn’t know you – would they agree to a video chat or give you their cell number? Fuck no. It’s no different on ALT.COM (there are exceptions to this, but not many).

I will repeat again what I said earlier …


If you think you can just sign up and lick some heels within hours because you forked over a few bucks, don’t bother joining. You’ve a;ready struck out.

Fetish dating is about building trust between people that will end up satisfying YOU and THEMSELVES with play time. It’s not a race – it’s not a contest to who can ‘get some’ quicker – it’s about meeting, understanding and pleasing (sometimes: discarding) people – and most of all yourself – by finding someone that can either dominate you or be dominated.

Back to ALT.COM – how do you DO THAT ONLINE? The best place to start is the chat rooms, and graduate to 1-on-1 conversations. I’ve seen people sign up and just show up in a chatroom and just say shit like ‘looking for someone to get tied down so I can shit on their chest TONIGHT – who’s in?’ followed by ‘you guys all suck I thought this was a real BDSM forum :( ’. Look – dude / chick / whatever – it’s NOT GOING TO HAPPEN! With those few sentences, that person alienated an entire community of people who were otherwise willing to accept them!

The first few days after you join ALT.COM – don’t talk too much – do *LISTEN* a lot. Listening will give you an indication of who’s been there for awhile, who’s willing to play and who’s a complete douchebag. Listening online is an edge – it’s worth exploring.

Much as in real-life BDSM meet-ups, you need to build a reputation on ALT.COM as trustworthy play partner. It’s actually *easier* to do in person rather than online – because generally, you can tell who’s a fraud and who’s not – a lot of ALT.COM users (including myself) are weary of someone who’s too forward and unwilling to have a few coffees. The ones that are impatient are the ones to avoid.

For those that have been to a few community parties – you know that girl that’s hog-tied in a cage being flogged in front of people? She’s comfortable with that because there’s 20 other folks around who know respect, and will enforce the BDSM code – nothing bad will actually happen beyond the fantasy she’s living out. ALT.COM takes that security away, in a certain way (all websites do!) – so people are extra careful when socializing.

In summary, here are the stats from my last 8 weeks on ALT.COM. It’s worth joining if you’re interested / curious in BDSM. But not if you’re a douche. Do keep in mind that because I’ve been involved in this community for awhile – I’m known pretty well – I probably ‘get some’ more than someone who would just join for the first time. That’s my disclaimer – but I’m also sexy. Hehe. Statistics

Measure Information
Overall Site Rating 8 out of 10
Site Look & Feel Fantastic!
Guy to Girl Ratio 3 guys to 1 girl
Initiated Contact With 47 outgoing emails
Replies Received 42 serious replies
Total Resulting Meets 33 meets (distinct)
Total Resulting Play Dates 29 play dates

As mentioned above, here’s the ALT.COM fetish list:

  1. Total Power Exchange
  2. Age Play
  3. Anal Beads
  4. Anal Sex (Giving)
  5. Anal Sex (Receiving)
  6. Ass Play
  7. Breath Play (Asphyxiaphilia)
  8. Biting
  9. Blindfolds
  10. Blood
  11. Body Hair
  12. Bondage
  13. Branding
  14. Breast / Nipple Torture
  15. Candle Wax
  16. Chains
  17. Chastity Devices
  18. Clamps
  19. Cling Film
  20. Cock & Ball Torture
  21. Collar / Leash
  22. Confinment / Caging
  23. Corporophilia / Scato / Shit Play
  24. Cross Dressing
  25. Cupping
  26. Dacryphilia (Tears)
  27. Defilement
  28. Denim
  29. Depiation / Shaving
  30. Discipline
  31. Doctor / Nurse
  32. Domination
  33. Ears
  34. Exhibitionism / Sex in Public
  35. Feathers
  36. Fire Play
  37. Fisting
  38. Food Play
  39. Foot Fetish
  40. Gangbangs
  41. Hair Pulling
  42. Handcuffs / Shackles
  43. High Heels
  44. Humiliation
  45. Infantilism / Diapers
  46. Knife Play
  47. Lace / Lingerie
  48. Lactation
  49. Latex
  50. Leather
  51. Making Movies
  52. Masks
  53. Masochism
  54. Massage
  55. Master / Slave
  56. Masturbation
  57. Medieval Device Torture
  58. Mutual Masturbation
  59. Needle Play
  60. Nipples
  61. Oral Fixation
  62. Oral Sex (Giving)
  63. Oral Sex (Receiving)
  64. Pain
  65. Pantyhose / Stockings
  66. Photography (Erotic)
  67. Piercings
  68. Pinching
  69. Play Piercing
  70. Power Exchange
  71. Pussy / Cock Worship
  72. Religious (Nun / Priest Play)
  73. Shoes & Boots
  74. Rimming
  75. Role Playing
  76. Rubber
  77. Sadism
  78. Scent
  79. Sensory Deprivation
  80. Sex during Period
  81. Spanking / Padding
  82. Tongue Fetish
  83. Toys
  84. Transvestism
  85. Water Sports / Urine
  86. Voyeurism
  87. Whips